No Regrets

During college, a friend on Facebook posted a link to a blog about a little girl named Daisy. I was drawn to the bright smiling face in the link. That first click began years of following Daisy as she battled a rare childhood cancer. Daisy's love for Christ and her steadfast faith were a tremendous encouragement and testimony. During the lowest of lows, Daisy and her family continued to trust in God and praise Him. This tiny girl had more faith than I could claim myself. After several years of battling cancer, Daisy is now at home with Christ. Definitely worshipping Him in her own beautiful and tremendous way.

Daisy's passing has struck my heart as a mom. When I started following Daisy, having a daughter of my own was a far off dream. Now that my own daughter is here, Daisy's life and death is an awakening. I want to raise a daughter with an unshakable faith in her Savior. I also want to raise her without regrets.

Last night, Ella woke up a LOT. At least 4 times. By now I thought that she would have been sleeping through the night, but every time that she started to sleep through the night something happened to set her back. Traveling across country, milestones, teething, getting sick, more teething, over and over again. But last night, I decided that I wouldn't regret those middle of the night cuddles. I wouldn't regret letting her curl up next to me in bed. No regretting of answering her cries of "up, mommy!" How many more opportunities would I have to cuddle her and calm her cries? Only God knows. I won't regret the minor decision of answering her in the middle of the night.

I won't regret the fact that Ella is still extremely attached to nursing. I won't regret those little moments each day of precious mom and baby time. The chance to cuddle her and hold her while she finally sits still for ten minutes with me.

Ten years down the road, I will not regret choosing a career that allowed me to keep Ella with me during the day. As hard as it is to take care of other peoples children, it has been a tremendous blessing to me as a mom. No matter how stressed out I may get during the day, I will not regret making the decision to be a nanny so that I could be a stay at home mom away from my own home.

As I stare at the massive pile of laundry or look around at the dishes that need to be washed, I will not regret the time spent watching Ella goof around before bed. The laughter as she walked around acting silly with the pacifier that she hasn't used in 10 months. Her smile as she dived on top of me and knocked me over. Watching her grab her baby doll and proceed to kiss it's face multiple times. Never will I regret the fact that some days, I chose to relax with my little girl instead of stressing about chores.

More importantly, I will not regret teaching my daughter to love Jesus even though it will set her apart from her peers and her family. I want her to be unashamedly in love with Christ. To be willing to stand in the face of tragedy and say that she trusts God with whatever His will may be. Following Christ is a huge risk, but it is never a regret. I want to raise a daughter who is willing to boldly live out her faith in front of the world. To use her skills and personal gifts for His glory.

I will not regret teaching her to lay down her life for Jesus. To sacrifice worldly goods for the greater good of her neighbors and Christ's mission. There will be no regret when we teach her (and discipline her for) what her actions and sins look like before God.


There are many little decisions that we make as parents, but unless they harm our children, we should not regret them. If we are continually seeking Christ as we parent our children, we should not regret the parenting techniques that are insignificant in the grand scheme of Christ's mission. 

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Repurposing a Puffs Container

Ella loves problem solving toys. Give her a shape sorter or a peg board and she will sit and play with it for a half an hour or more (no exaggeration!) For Christmas we got Ella an 8 pack of the thick crayons. She loves coloring (aka scribbling), but even more, she loves putting the crayons in and out of their box. While at her grandparents this weekend, Ella loved the crayon box to death. I stuck her crayons in a ziploc bag and planned to find a new place for them once we got home. Today I found the perfect way to combine Ella's love for shape sorters and her love for her crayons. I found a used puff snacks container and decided to repurpose it into a crayon container.

This project was incredibly easy and made me want to find more ways to repurpose items around our house. My mind was immediately filled with ways to create fun activities for Ella.

Creating the crayon holder is ridiculously easy. Most of us with infants and toddlers have puffs or snack containers lying around.

Puffs Container Crayon Holder

1. Remove the label

2. Clean and dry the container

3. Use the crayon (or other desired shaped object) to trace the shape onto the lid.

4. Use a knife to start and cut out the shape

5. Use scissors or knife to finish cutting out the desired shape

6. Glue a ribbon loop onto the bottom of the lid to create an easy off tab for removal (optional)

7. Decorate!

After I finished cutting out the crayon hole, I allowed Ella to decorate it. She loves stickers and had a lot of fun decorating her container. She then proceeded to spend an entire hour putting crayons in and taking them out. ONE WHOLE HOUR. Glorious time that I used to get stuff done around the house and relax with a cup of coffee. 

This craft can easily be adapted to make other fun shape sorting activities. You could use one puffs container for circle shapes, one for squares, and so on. You could also use a bigger container such as a coffee can or Gerber toddler snacks container, and cut out multiple shapes on the lid. It is a great way to upcycle household items into fun toys. 

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Picky Toddlers and Sneaky Veggie Mac and Cheese

Little kids are PICKY! Before having Ella and nannying for young toddlers, I was somewhat high and mighty about picky eating. As a child I was extremely picky. My mom had to peel the skin off of my hot dogs! I swore that my own children would not have the option to be picky eaters. They would eat what I served or else! And then I became a mom and nanny.

While I still am firm in my stance that my children will eat what I serve (I'm a mom, not a short order cook!), I quickly realized that you cannot force a baby or toddler to eat something that they have no desire to eat. They are incapable of being reasoned with or even bribed (sometimes a plateful of carrots is worth an oreo). No matter how delectable you make your steamed broccoli appear, that 18 month old who refuses to eat green foods will not let it touch his lips. So how do you get a picky veggie hating tot to eat his or her veggies? Well, I sneak them into their favorite foods!

Ella is an AMAZING eater! She puts me to shame. So far (cross my fingers) she is willing to try anything and everything. BUT Ella is an extremely strong willed one year old. Although she loves bananas, she might not want it one morning and refuse to eat it. If she is not in the mood for a certain food, she will not eat it. Or sometimes she wants utensils. The pear cubes that she wouldn't touch are suddenly delicious if eaten with a fork. We will have our hands full with this one!

The boys that I watch are PICKY eaters. I could probably count the foods that they will eat on two hands (maybe one). Mac and Cheese is favorite of theirs. And not the lovely homemade kind, but the sodium saturated instant cups of Kraft Mac and Cheese. While I have somewhat given up on getting the 3 year old to eat his veggies (only eats carrots and corn), the 18 month old is still capable of being deceived into eating veggies.

While making some homemade mac and cheese sauce the other day, I got the idea of adding pureed carrots. The cheese sauce is yellow orange and carrots are orange, so no one will be the wiser right? Right! I made my cheese sauce and elbow macaroni and before I added the cheese to the pasta, I added in the pureed carrots and then used an immersion blender to puree the entire sauce mixture.

H (the 18 month old that I nanny) seemed to like it well enough. He gets in funky moods and doesn't want much food sometimes. But, Ella LOVED it. We had leftovers and she has had it for lunch this week. While she will eat veggies when I give them to her, it is nice to sneak in an extra serving when I can.

This is definitely a recipe to remember! And I look forward to trying more deceptive meals in the future. Hmmm, I wonder what you can hide spinach in? That would amaze the boys mom!

Veggie Mac and Cheese

2 cups Elbow Pasta

1.5 Cups Milk (Any milk that you normally drink is fine. Coconut, cows, soy, etc.)

1 Cup Shard Cheddar Cheese Shredded (use milder cheese if desired)

2 tbsp flour

2 tbsp butter

.5-1 tbsp ground mustard 

pepper to taste

1-2 tsp garlic powder

1-2 tsp onion powder

optional: a dash or two of ground red pepper (Ella likes this)

1-2 cups pureed carrots, squash, pumpkin, or other appropriately colored (orange/yellow) veggie

1. Cook pasta according to package directions and set aside

2. In medium sauce pan melt butter over medium heat

3. Gradually add flour and mix until combined, stirring constantly

4. Add milk gradually and stir until combined

5. Add spices

6. Add cheese. Stir until melted.

7. Taste and adjust spices as needed

8. Add pureed veggie

9. Use an immersion blender or stand blender to blend the finished sauce (This might not be necessary if your puree was finely pureed. Mine was a bit chunky still).

8. Pour the sauce over the pasta and enjoy!

*You can used pureed baby food, fresh veggies, or frozen ones. I simply cooked the veggies until soft, added some water, and pureed them using an immersion blender.

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Life Lessons From Ella

This past year has taught me a lot about myself as a person and as a mom. Ella is a fantastic teacher and really pushes you to break the mold and to think outside of the box. Maybe that's due to her stubborn nature and pure cuteness ;).

I wanted to share some of the lessons that raising Ella has taught me so far. I am sure there are many more to come. The terrible two's and the even more terrible and trying three's are sure to teach me countless lessons!

Ella's Life Lessons

1. Laugh every day. At least once a day: Ella is our families clown. She has a silly personality and is always making us laugh. But, it's not just her silliness that we laugh at. Sometimes you need to laugh when baby does something frustrating or nasty. Like when I woke up to Ella covered in throw up yesterday and in poop today. Laughing really helps ease the tension!
2. Don't break your back trying to get household chores done: There are days when I want to pull my hair out over all that I need to get done around the house. Working 33 hours a week, it is easy for me to fall behind on household chores. Then, on days off I am scrambling around trying to get everything done. If it doesn't get done during the week, it is nearly impossible to get it all done on the weekend (our designated family time). Only after going crazy one Sunday morning trying to get the house tidy before we had guests over after church, did I realize that I needed to stop stressing so much over the house. No mom is perfect, and I bet more of us than you realize, don't have perfect houses 24/7. A little mess is OK. It takes time to adjust to the role of motherhood, working, and household manager. 
3. Don't do it alone: I got pregnant 5 months after we moved across the country. 2000 miles away from my close family and friends. Making friends is a lot harder once you leave college, but it is just as necessary. Christians (and all people) need community. It is how God designed us. As an independent person, I have always been the type to try and do things on my own. Rarely asking for help. In college I chose to write a major research paper on my own rather than do it in a group! My success needs to depend on me and not on others. BUT! This is not how God designed us. He designed us to thrive in a community setting. To do things as a family. I am but one measly part of God's body. A finger who is lost without the hand. This has become increasingly obvious in motherhood. Raising a baby is HARD! Toddlers are even harder! I have found that it is important to connect with other women and moms. To form play groups not just for our kids social development, but for our own support and encouragement. It has made a tremendous difference in my spiritual and emotional well-being. Even if I go to story-time 3 times a week, I am glad to be surrounded by other moms and fellow Christians.
4. Remember there is no "right" way to parent a child: As a first time mom, I was given a lot of advice from other moms. I was told that I need "this book" and to do certain things to ensure that my baby would turn out OK. It is a bit overwhelming! But, the moment that the doctors laid Ella on my now unpregnant stomach, I realized that she was MY daughter and that I would know the best way to parent her. Whether I chose to be a Baby Wise mom, an attachment parenting mom, a mom who coslept, or a mom who put baby in her own crib from day 1, I would be the exact mom that Ella needed. No one parenting style is the RIGHT parenting style. I quickly realized that all moms do things differently. All moms know what their families needs are. And that the way that they choose to parent their child is the best way for their family. Often times I hear moms making excuses for why they do the things that they do. We don't need to make excuses, we need to embrace each other. As long as we are raising our children to love and to glorify their Savior and God, the everyday practical stuff is of little significance. Christ does not care whether we nursed them until 5 months of 5 years. He cares that their precious hearts belong to him.
5. God is in charge of the big and the little things in life: I am a worrier. I often have a hard time of remembering that I serve a sovereign God who is control of ALL aspects of my life. God is in charge of our finances, health, homes, careers, and our family. When one of these areas of our lives are being challenged, we often times we lose sight of how strong and powerful our God is. Yet, it quicklt becomes obvious that God is in control of the major aspects of our lives. But, what about the little things? What about the neighbors who surround us? How our children grow and develop? When baby walks? Who you meet at story time this week? These little areas of our lives are the ones that I believe we are most prone to forgetting God in. God designed our children, our neighborhoods, our random encounters with other people, all to achieve glory for Him. It may sound silly, but God deeply cares about 
6. Babies are not perfect either: I know that I am far from perfect and I am more than aware that my husband is not perfect ;), but babies are not perfect either. Just because there are these so called "normal" ages by which babies do certain things, does not mean that baby will necessarily sleep through the night or want you to put food into her mouth. Babies are messy, loud, and temperamental creatures! They throw things, get hurt, hurt you, spill food and drinks, have massive blow out diapers, and do lots of other less than perfect things. At 1, Ella has perfected the temper tantrum and is one of the most stubborn people that I know. At 1! She is far from perfect. 
7. Don't beat yourself up: I sometimes get frustrated and down on myself for not being the "perfect" wife and mother. There are days that the house is a mess, dinner is the last thing that I want to do, and the laundry hamper is looking dangerously like Mt. Everest. On these days I sometimes feel like a failure as a wife and mom. Over the course of Ella's first year, I have learned to give myself grace. Life is CRAZY. And 6 loads of dirty laundry is not (as much as we sometimes think it is) the end of the world. My marriage and my children will survive the occasional dinner of frozen entrees and take out food. No one will die if "that shirt" is not clean in time for the morning. And as much as husbands might groan about disorganization and dirty dishes, they don't really care that much or else they would get to work doing it themselves!
8. Kisses, cuddles, hugs, and smiles make everything better: Even after Ella has thrown a ridiculous and massive tantrum, her laugh instantly brings a smile to my face. There is something about the cute affectionate moments that instantly breaks through my tough mom act. Tears, tantrums, screams, and yelling are unbearable at times, but its the loving and cuddly moments that I live for as a mom. 
9. Schedule "you" time: Although I am not technically a stay at home mom, Ella is with me 24/7 since she comes with me as I nanny for 33 hours each week. As a nursing mom of a baby who refused a bottle after 4 months, it was not easy for me to physically get away for some me time. Me time has proven crucial for me during the first year. I have found that it allows moms to recharge, find some calm in the chaos of the day, and be better equipped to handle the rest of the day ahead of me. While Ella still naps twice a day, I have made a point to spend at least 30 minutes each day doing something that I enjoy (typically reading). I know that many moms use nap time to catch up on household chores and meal prep, but it's important not to forget about yourself. Whether you take some you time before the kids wake up, during naps, or after bedtime, you will be better equipped to cook, clean, care for your husband and kids, and thrive spiritually if you don't neglect your own physical and emotional needs.
10. Don't forget your husband: All too often new parents fall into the trap of focusing their full energy on their children rather than on their marriage. With a cute, helpless, cooing bundle of joy it is a fairly easy trap to get caught in. Yet, what child wants to grow up in a home built on a shaky foundation? As a child who grew up in a broken family, I can say that a healthy parental marriage is a lot more important in the long run than being the center of mommy and daddy's universe. I am a new mom myself and I can say that it is an overwhelming job! There is a lot to do between night wakings, feeding baby AND husband, cleaning laundry, cleaning the house, working, meal prep, and ensuring that your family survives the day. But, throughout the entire time my husband has been beside me. We are not perfect new parents or even perfect newlyweds. We butt heads and disagree. Yet, he is to be my number one relationship after my relationship with Christ. God has a specific plan for the family order and when I fail to follow that I can see its effects throughout our home. Plan date nights, movie nights at home, dinner alone, time to talk. You don't need to spend money, but you do need to invest time. 

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Feeling Like A "Real" Wife and Mom Now

Growing up, I always was in awe of the women who could throw together a delicious meal without ever cracking open a cookbook. How did they do it? Was it magic? Did they have an innate knowledge of what ingredients went well together and what spices would perfect a dish? Does something magical occur the moment a woman becomes a wife and mother?

Well, over the course of my almost two year long marriage, I have come to realize that the secret to creating delicious meals is time and experience. As with any skill or talent, time and experience prove invaluable. While I have always considered myself a good cook and baker, I have never defined myself by those terms. In my mind a truly terrific cook or baker is one who can imagine and create delicious concoctions from scratch. A true master is one who writes the book, not one who uses it.

After countless meals cooked and deserts baked, I am proud to say that I have crossed the line between cookbook dependent wife and mom into the land of pioneers! I have taken risks and accepted the fact that I might fail. Someone might get poisoned. Well, not poisoned, but surely grossed out! And, I have succeeded. Progress has been slow, but it has paid off. I have created two of my own recipes that are husband and baby approved.

My creations are mainly due to the recipes that I have tried and enjoyed over the past two years. I have taken the back bones of basic recipes and been able to add and amplify them to meet my taste desires. So, in one sense, I am not a pioneer cook. I have created nothing new. Still, it is progress!

Tonights success was the semi crockpot chicken tortilla soup. I had numerous recipes available, but decided to have fun and try my own ideas. It is a basic chicken tortilla soup and could be embellished depending on your tastes and preferences.

Chicken Tortilla Soup:

One medium onion chopped

2 tbsp minced garlic

64 oz chicken broth

3 chicken breasts (around 1lb)

1 cup salsa

2 tsp cumin

1 tsp ground red pepper

1 can diced southwestern style diced tomatoes (jalapeños & green chilies)

4 oz can of diced green chilies

½ can black beans

1 cup frozen corn

1 tbsp Franks hot sauce

Place chicken breasts in crockpot and top with salsa and Franks

Cook on high for 3-4 hours or until the chicken shreds easily

In large pot, sauté onions and garlic in olive oil until tender and translucent

Add the rest of the ingredients.

Shred the chicken/salsa mixture and add to the pot

Bring to a boil and simmer for 30 minutes or until ready to heat

Serve hot topped with cheese, sour cream, tortilla chips, etc. 

Another recipe that I have created is a chili recipe. This recipe was discovered in a similar way to my tortilla soup recipe. I took the basic chili recipe and tweaked  and added to it until I had the taste that I desired. I will share that recipe in a later post. It is pretty good, if I must say so myself.

So, why does creating a recipe make me feel like a "real" wife and mom? It is probably due to the fact that I grew up watching reruns of early sitcoms in which the mom was the perfect 1950s woman with a little sass and humor mixed in. Or it might be due to my slight addiction to cooking shows in which women simply throw together wonderful dishes. Whatever the reason, I feel a sense of accomplishment in finally making a dish my own. I am growing up :)

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11 Months Old!

This past week, Ella turned 11 months old. Only one more month to go until her first birthday!  This year has truly flown by. One moment we are holding a calm little bundle of joy and the next we are dealing with a hyperactive, social, chatter box of a nearly toddler.

Ella has become even more social, vocal, and more of a spazz this past month. She is constantly "talking" and never lets you get a word in! It is cute to have her lecture us and I love hearing her voice as we go about our day. She has around 18 recognizable words and a couple ones that we she says consistently, but that we can't comprehend. Definitely will be dealing with some communication frustration soon! Her favorite words at the moment are "guy" (used for any non-animal creature), "cat" (used for animals except for duck, cow, and dog), and "mum" (She really likes yelling for me when she is frustrated or needs help). The boys that I nanny for have taken pride in teaching Ella to talk. I blame them for her non-stop chatter :)

Over this past month, Ella has become more loving and cuddly. She will often come up to me or Tim and lay her head in our laps or on our chests. So glad little miss independent finally discovered her affectionate side! She has also become a bit more of a spazz. Climbing and jumping around. Her favorite activity is to play on the couch and roll around and through herself backwards and forwards. It is terrifying when she is near the edge!

Another exciting (and messy) skill that Ella has begun to master, is the ability to eat with a spoon. Since she feeds herself, I have been giving her a spoon to practice with at meals during which a spoon would be appropriate. And after a couple of months of practicing and occasionally succeeding, she has finally figured out how to scoop and eat with a spoon. She still uses her hand 60% of the time, but it is fun to watch her try!

This month, we are looking forward to the holiday season. It will be Ella's first Thanksgiving and we are excited to see how she reacts to all of the food. She is a big foodie and it should be a blast watching her enjoy her first Thanksgiving feast. We have been pondering traditions that we would like to start with Ella this coming Thanksgiving and Christmas. Traditions are such a fun part of the holidays!

Raising Ella has been a blessing and a challenge. We are looking forward to the months and years ahead of us. There will be lots of stress, chaos, love, laughter, tears, cheers, pain, and joy. Every day I am thankful that God decided to add Ella to our little family. It is a tremendous gift and responsibility.

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Baby Legs!

Who has not seen those adorable leg warmers that trendy babies wear? Pre-baby, I was not impressed with the leg warmers that 90s work out addicts wore (not impressed with 90s styles in general). Now, post-Ella, I love when babies are attired in a cute onesie and some even cuter baby leg warmers. But, like a lot of moms, I did not want to spend the $10-$15 a pair on these cute fashion accessories.

After seeing a lot of babies decked out in baby legs, I decided to find out how to make them on my own. I am no crafty momma! I might get creative in the kitchen for Ella, but I rarely bust out the needle and thread for her. Her dad even painted her name letters for her nursery because we knew that he would do a better job. But! Baby legs are EASY to make. Even someone who doesn't typically do crafts (like myself) these leg warmers are a simple and doable craft.

My first stop was to Target to find the perfect pair of knee high socks. These adorable knee socks only cost $2.50 a pair and frequently go on sale! Much cheaper than the pre-made baby legs! You can also buy knee socks at any of your favorite stores or online.

I then cut off the foot portion of the sock. I cut right above the heel.

I discarded foot portion (Ella stole them and ran away...) and then turned the socks inside out. Once inside out, I folded up the cut portion of the sock. I folded about an inch, but could have made a larger hem since Ella is somewhat short. The hem can be adjusted depending on babies height. I used a coordinating black thread and hand-sewed a hem. Not that hard to do!

The finished products is one cute and affordable pair of baby leg warmers!

And one adorable baby model :)

The cost:

Adult knee high socks: $2.00 (on sale at Target)

Thread Set: $3.00 

Sewing Scissors: $6.99

Total: 11:99 (But now equipped to make lots of leg warmers for as little as $2 a pair!)

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